i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Nicole vs. Life
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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