Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
