i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
