So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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