belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
