Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
