We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
21 Times Karma Showed These People Not to Mess Around
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar