so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?