We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
We got so high we made milksteak
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
