Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
