matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize