this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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