Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Randomize
