Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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