you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
if only i could text you this smell
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
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have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
OPIZZABONMYDICK
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
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You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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