We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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