Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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