We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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