Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize