I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
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