We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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