Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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