I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
worst night to have a conscience
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I'm always down for nudity.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize