just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize