I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
