i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Tornado booty call.. dedication
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
That accounts for only three of the penises
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
