it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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