ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
