My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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