Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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