There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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