Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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