In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
