Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
