Bisexual people are plain selfish.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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