ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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