Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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