You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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