WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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