We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Everything about him screamed your future.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize