Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
How external is "for external use only"?
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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