You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I am in a vortex of obligation.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
