So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
