Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
