O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize