if you like me you must not know who I am
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize