let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
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All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
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although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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