i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
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