I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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