But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Can Purell be used as lube?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Are we still banned from the library?
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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