is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
