"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize