i will never coherently bang her
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
